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Sunday, April 1, 2012

Spring sprung, then left

I've not updated in quite some time. That's partially because I'm pretty good and things are stable and partly cause I feel so miserable I don't even want to write it.

So, I've been seeing this therapist now for a few months. I really like her. She's easy to talk and I find her input on things very helpful. She's not all "how do you feel about that?" but actually chimes in with her own stories and experiences. I enjoy talking to her.

The problem is, I don't actually talk to her about the real problems. I talk about work and problems there and that sort of thing, but really, its pretty basic stuff that I can handle.

The real problems - they are much harder to just bring up. And if I don't bring them up, we dont' talk about them. Last week, I had decided that I really wanted to start to bring up the real stuff going on. I knew it was going to be impossible to bring up. So, I thought about writing it down, in a letter to her.

That's was a great idea until I pictured actually giving her the letter. That's when I decided not to write the letter and just be ballsy enough to bring it up. I didn't.

Now, its high on my mind again, and I've got to find a way to bring it up.


Sherri said...

it can be so hard sometimes to start a conversation about the tough stuff... i like your idea of writing it down...

what about email? could you email her something before your appt and include how hard it has been for you to bring up the tough stuff?

or email her and let her know you have some tough stuff to talk about but are having a hard time bringing it up... then she can ask you about it or help you work into speaking about it?

a few ideas... might not work or maybe you've already tried them


Heidi said...

Those actually are really good ideas...but I had a bit of breakdown yesterday and called her to schedule an appointment this week. I didn't originally have one, so hopefully that's enough push to get me to bring it all up. I have 5 topics and if I just remember, it's all good.